I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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