That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
