Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
