i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
