It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
