Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
