Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
