I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
