Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
This house was built for laser tag.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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