So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
