I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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