proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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