FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
