His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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