so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
