And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize