I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Actions speak louder than pants.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
