I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
