My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize