is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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