I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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