I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
