Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
