Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
