To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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