Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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