You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
