its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize