he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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