Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize