4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
