K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
