Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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