he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
