the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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