the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just put wine in my tea
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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