Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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