ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
