So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
