Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
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He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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