We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Help. Why am I so naked?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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