And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
