cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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