I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
