Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
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Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
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Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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