3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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