No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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