too bad you live with your parents still
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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