hotel room ftw
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
