I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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