Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
